Posts by Bhaal

The patch readme says

1400MB. I said it was buggy didnt i? The point is i like it so much that i dont care.

Some games transcend genres. Deus Ex, Warcraft 3 and Metroid Prime are three

names that spring instantly to mind. And it is in this heady company that Vampire: The

Masquerade - Bloodlines almost finds itself.

Yes, you read the title correctly. A

complex title (well, at least in terms of length and punctuation) for a complex game. To

start at the beginning: you are a new vampire whose sire has been put to death for creating

you without permission from the vampire elders. Cast afloat in your new life with no guide,

you must discover for yourself the murky world of vampire politics, and the disturbing

rumblings of the coming of Gehenna - the apocalypse.

In many ways, Vampire is similar

to Deus Ex. From a starting point of ignorance, the storyline unfolds around you, engulfing

you. Conversations cover subjects as diverse as politics, mythology, schizophrenia and lap

dancing, without causing a distraction. In fact Ive never played a game which tackles adult

subjects with such ease and wit, nor gets away with this amount of swearing, simply because

none of it is out of place. This immersion, just like with Deus Ex, makes Vampire a very

difficult game to put down. The RPG style stats system is also similar. Completing quests

provides you with experience points, which can then be spent to improve fighting abilities,

character attributes, and vampire powers. But comparing any game to Deus Ex is incredibly

dangerous and can only lead to disappointment, and sadly, this is the case here

too.

Vampire is current the only game other than Half Life 2 to be using the Source

engine. Unfortunately, while Half Life 2 is optimised to within an inch of its life (hell,

it even runs acceptably on my low/mid range spec), Vampire is not. It has sound jitters,

jerkiness, and some of the worst graphical glitches Ive ever seen. Of course, as this is

the Source engine, the graphics are otherwise beautiful. In fact, the game gives the engine

a more intensive workout than Half Life 2, with close-ups of faces during conversation

really showing off the range of expressions available.

Vampire is also the most

memory whoring game ever, requiring a 1400MB swap file and not even running smoothly on a

system with 1 gig of RAM. In essence, its not finished, and the recently released patch

does almost nothing to fix these problems, providing the disclaimer Your computer sucks,

get a new one. Or words to that effect.

There is one more problem - combat. To start

with it is particularly weak, following a simple you hit them, they hit you, repeat until

someone is dead model. With stat increases things start to get a little better however, and

throwing powers into the mix adds some spice to the more important battles. However the

reason I claim that Vampire doesnt manage to transcend genres is that it doesnt quite work

as a shooter. Gun wielding is a little clunky, fairly ineffective unless your stats are

good, and just a lot less fun than using melee weapons, or just sucking the life out of your

opponents.

The ideas behind Vampire are excellent, and the potential is there for

this to be a truly great game. Its just a pity it isnt properly

finished.

8/10

jeez!

I thought

that gfx/cpu/mobo upgrade ive been trying to talk myself into would be enuff to run it, but

if that's true, my 512 ram will still cause the comp to die

Good boy. Great game. Shame about all the bugs.

There are soooo many of them

See, thats the problem, regardless of whether you were joking or not.

People, on the

whole, are fucking idiots. And the average gamer is a 13 year old american idiot. That is

why EA do so well, while games like Sands of Time, Metroid Prime 2 and Riddick fall by the

wayside. I get angry just thinking about it.

Prince

of Persia: Sands of Time was undoubtedly one of the best games of 2003/2004. It was charming

and witty, set in a beautifully airy palace where dust-motes danced in beams of sunlight

shining through the windows. More important than all this, it was thought-provoking and

highly enjoyable, in a market currently flooded by grisly, brainless first person

shooters.

So where can you go from there? Sadly, despite everything it had going for

it, Sands of Time didnt sell many copies. This has caused Ubisoft to run in completely the

opposite direction with its sequel, Prince of Persia: Warrior Within. I can imagine the

design meeting going something like this:

Designer: So, we have a game

which people really enjoy, but it didnt sell that well. What can we do to improve

this?
Marketer: Semi-clad leather-wearing women! Preferably in

thongs!!!
Marketer:Pant
Designer: O......kay, and what about

the gameplay?
Marketer: Well, we had a game before that was all about

finding your way to the next section, with occasional fighting. How about we create a sequel

thats all about fighting, with a bit of not-very-interesting exploring and a lot of

confusion. That can pass as pseudo-intelligent and will keep people playing

longer.

Thus, the problems with this game are numerous and huge. Combat, the weakest

aspect of Sands of Time, is now the main focus. It crops up everywhere, and the large number

of combos you are provided with reduces the whole process to a button-mashing mess. The

sandstone palace has been replaced by a gothic castle, grey and dark, with a sound track to

match. The whole game in fact is seeped in bloody grimness, with much more emphasis being

placed on decapitation and cleaving animations than on exploration and enjoyment. The

script, such as it is, ranges from cheesy to downright painful, with the Princes charm and

wit so lacking that you could be forgiven for thinking that Warrior Within was written by

those responsible for the brain-dead offerings of Need For Speed Underground.

It

doesnt end there either. The camera, which caused most of the frustration in Sands of Time,

remains unchanged. You still cant pan through walls, which occasionally forces the player

into unnecessarily claustrophobic environments, or makes you fight against opponents who are

off the edge of the screen. The fixed camera angles can also be problematic - to pick a

specific example, on one occasion you have to run up a wall and grab a rope. The camera is

fixed in a position which makes this difficult, but makes accidentally running along

the wall and out over the edge of a cliff much easier.

Sadly, this game is a

disappointment from the very first cut-scene. Boycott it - go out and buy Sands of Time

instead. You wont regret it, and you will be giving an under-sold game some much needed

support.

6/10 (3/10 for disappointment)

my top 50:

1 Shawshank Redemption
2 Pulp Fiction
3

Crouching Tiger
4 Leon
5 Memento
6 Matrix
7 Gladiator
8

Usual Suspects
9 LA Confidential
10 Fight Club
11 Fifth Element
12

Enemy at the Gate
13 American Beauty
14 Shrek
15 Negotiator
16 Lord

of the Rings Trilogy
17 Schindler's List
18 True Romance
19 Shakespeare

in Love
20 The Butterfly Effect
21 Ocean's 11
22 High Fidelity
23

Clerks
24 Unbreakable
25 SW: Empire Strikes Back
26 Beautiful Mind
27

Shrek 2
28 Dogma
29 Mallrats
30 Garden State
31 SW: Return of the

Jedi
32 Face Off
33 The Rock
34 Desperado
35 Reservoir Dogs
36

Equilibrium
37 Starship Troopers
38 Con Air
39 The Insider
40

Finding Nemo
41 Minority Report
42 House of Flying Daggers
43 Eternal

Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
44 Heat
45 Dances with Wolves
46

Blade Runner
47 SW: A New Hope
48 Braveheart
49 Terminator 2
50

Shaun of the Dead

EVILNESS!

killed HL2, where my old

drivers had no problem. (Yay for rollback)

Im on a Ti4200....dont get them if u run a

Geforce 4

sorry to be an ass but a) this is in the wrong place and b) Halo

is no more than an average FPS. Sure, its great on a console, and works where only Goldeneye

did before, but put it up next to a REAL game (ie Half Life 2) and it pales into

insignificance. Also, what is with the stupid repetitive boring Library section? Infinite

swarm spawn points? pffffffff Bungie can go bugger themselves with an XBox controller.

(Sorry, that was a bit harsh.)

Every year at around this time I ask

myself a question. How can a glorified spreadsheet be one of the most popular games of the

year? The answer is as simple as the concept behind the game: football supporters all think

they can manage their club better than anyone else. So Championship Manager was born, and

soon became one of the most widely played games of all time. What started out as a crude

DOS-based UK-only game became a global phenomenon with almost 100 leagues from over 40

countries. With scouts around the world providing stats on thousands of players, it has

often been suggested that real football managers might benefit from CMs

database.

Sadly, all good stories have to end. Championship Manager is no longer the

game we knew, loved, and sacrificed copious amounts of free time for. Publishers Eidos and

developers Sports Interactive have split, with Eidos keeping the rights to the Championship

Manager name. The next CM game you will see will have nothing to do with the previous 12

editions.

But no developers worth their keyboard are going to throw away that kind of

history, so the boys at SI joined forces with Sega. Thus Football Manager 2005 came into

being. Granted, its not such a familiar name, and FM is harder to say than CM, but we

loyalists can live with that.

Football Manager contains everything you would have

expected from the next CM title. Transfers have been implemented, media interaction

improved, stats reassessed and the 2D match engine enhanced. As well as this there is the

continuing expansion of the game to include more leagues from across the world. The

interface has also been changed. Getting used to it is slightly confusing at first, but so

was the switch from CM2 to CM3, and again to CM4, and after an adjustment period no one ever

wanted to go back. The same is the case here, with information more easily accessible than

ever before. Matches deserve a particular mention - there is now a split screen view,

allowing you to watch the 2D pitch and player or match stats at the same time.

Of

course, if you have played the CM games, you know exactly what FM is about. If not, it is

the best, most well researched football managing game you will find. Until next year. It

just doesnt break any particularly new ground. There is not much more to say. Yes, it is a

spreadsheet, but comparing it to Excel is like comparing the crayon scribblings of a

3-year-old to Van Gogh.

In the epic words of Brian Clough, I wouldn't say I was

the best manager in the business, but I was in the top one. Go forth and live the dream -

its going to be a great season.

9/10

I would like to start

this review with a disclaimer: I am not a chav. I do not like Burberry baseball caps, or

Kappa trousers. I also find chav-mobiles, in their real life urban wasteland setting, to be

ridiculous. But provide me with flashing lights and shiny graphics, and I plunge headlong

into Self Loathing City, otherwise known as Bayview, EAs fictitious chav-ville

extraordinaire and the setting for its latest game - Need For Speed Underground

2.

The first thing that strikes you about NFSU 2 is that EA have shamelessly ripped

off Grand Theft Auto. No, actually the first thing is that the story is pointless and

empty, and that cartoon style cut-scenes seem out of context next to the visuals in the rest

of the game. That is of only peripheral importance however. Basically it appears that EA

have taken GTAs free roaming city setting, pumped up the shininess, and removed the

violence - in other words, NFSU 2 is what GTA would be if it was a racing game.

You

cruise around the city, looking for races or shops to tune your ride. These appear on a

world map, which is supplemented by a smaller map of your direct surroundings - another

feature familiar to anyone who has played GTA. Races come in a number of flavours: Sprint,

Circuit, Drag and Drift all featured in the original NFSU, with new modes Street-X - a

tight, drift-style race where accurate cornering is everything, Underground Race League -

6-way racing on proper circuits, and my personal favourite, Outrun. Outrun races are entered

into if you meet a fellow racer while cruising the streets between races, and challenge

them. The aim is then to get 1000 yards ahead of your opponent. This gives you a chance to

race freely - to pick whatever route you wish - and is immensely enjoyable.

As well

as racing you can change the features of your car, both enhancing performance through a

number of upgrades and improving its look through new bodywork, paint, vinyl stickers, neon

lights and so forth. Its enough to make any chav wet him or herself with glee, and yet the

cars look neither out of place, nor ludicrously silly. This is obviously due to the lack of

realism - if NFSU 2 was set in a disused multi-story car park, normality would be restored.

That is to EAs credit - they have created a world which is shiny and colourful enough to

force either suspension of disbelief, or brain damage.

Overall, NFSU 2 is an empty

but strangely compelling racing game. I just pray for a Project Gotham PC conversion, so I

dont have to feel this dirty every time I play a racing game.

how about...you just crack the cd? i mean physically

The PC version of GTA:SA hasnt even been started

yet

hmmm

/signs up

yay! now they can take another crap film and make another crap game outta

it.

**cough**Catwoman**cough**

ok...chance for

me to be uber-geek. here are my top 50 movies

1 Shawshank Redemption
2 Pulp

Fiction
3 Crouching Tiger
4 Matrix
5 Leon
6 Memento
7

Gladiator
8 Fifth Element
9 Usual Suspects
10 LA Confidential
11

Fight Club
12 Lord of the Rings Trilogy
13 Enemy at the Gate
14 American

Beauty
15 Negotiator
16 Shrek
17 Schindler's List
18 The

Butterfly Effect
19 True Romance
20 Unbreakable
21 Shakespeare in

Love
22 Face Off
23 The Rock
24 Desperado
25 Ocean's 11
26 High

Fidelity
27 SW: Empire Strikes Back
28 Beautiful Mind
29 Clerks
30 SW:

Return of the Jedi
31 Shrek 2
32 Reservoir Dogs
33 Equilibrium
34

Dogma
35 Mallrats
36 Starship Troopers
37 Con Air
38 The Insider
39

Finding Nemo
40 Minority Report
41 House of Flying Daggers
42 Heat
43

Dances with Wolves
44 Blade Runner
45 SW: A New Hope
46

Braveheart
47 Terminator 2
48 Shaun of the Dead
49 6th sense
50

Pirates of the Caribbean

I guess u'll have seen most of them. New ones are House

of Flying Daggers, Butterfly Effect and Shaun of the Dead.

Also try to see

Collateral, and REALLY watch all of Kevin Smith's stuff (Clerks, Mallrats, Dogma, Chasing

Amy and (too a lesser extent) Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (but only after seeing the

other 4, or u wont get all the references))

oh i could go on for hours..

oh ffs! no i will not become an EA bitch again!

/sigh
/waves good-bye to the last thing that made a gaming PC worthwhile

this means yet

another game i wont touch due to EA involvement

bah! simpleton