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At the beginning god created the man. He looked at his beautiful work and was totally happy so he created the woman.Then he got worried about the man so he gave him the alcohol. Candlelight dinner:She: Kiss me just one more time and im yours for the rest of your life.He: Thanks for the warning... He + she having sex:She starts to scream: yeah... oh yeahhh - tell me something dirty!He: Kitchen, Bathroom, living room.... A young woman goes to the supermarket a little bit shopping... she has to pa…

oh i think she will say "funny guy this OP-R8R"hell that are only jokes... loli mean my ex-gfs had to live with that and my future gfs will also have to live with that.... such things make life more interesting better than a boring world without all this

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(Quote) she will say "tell him that last night was just great and that he shouldnt publish the video on the net" ok and here are some jokes A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, "When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?" The husband replied, "All I wanted to do was to fuck your brains out, and suck your tits dry." Then, as the …

some of them ive heard/seen - some i post from time to time on the server are just what came into my mind -> "original OP-jokes" TM(c)(R)well sometimes its good to be creative

A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 15 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!". The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past ten minutes!" A woman posts an ad in the news paper that looks like this... 'Looking for man with these qualifications; won't beat me up; or run away from me and is great in bed.' She got lots of phone calls replying to her ad but met someone perfect at her door one…

A true story: Publisher Releases Guide to Kicking CatsJuly 25, 2002 - USAThe 45 page colour instructional book entitled "Kicking Cats" guides men through the process of kicking cats down flights of stairs without repercussions from their spouse or girlfriends. "It isn't as easy as one would think to successfully do and get away with", comments author John Moore. "I was caught numerous times by my at the time girlfriends and eventually became determined to develop a fail-proof process. This book…

The angry wife met her husband at the door. There was alcohol on his breath and lipstick on his collar. "I assume," she snarled, "that there is a very good reason for you to come waltzing in here at six o'clock in the morning?" "There is," he replied. "Breakfast." Woman rushes into her house one morning and yells to her husband,"Sam, pack up your stuff. I just won the lottery!""Shall I pack for warm weather or cold?""Whatever. Just so you're out of the house by noon!" A man was walking along a …

The limousine was taking the beautiful, raven-haired model to the airport. Halfway there, the front tire went flat. The model said, "Driver, I don't have time to wait for road service. Can you change it yourself?" The driver said, "Sure." He got out of the car and proceeded to change the tire, but couldn't get the wheel cover off. The model saw him struggling and asked, "Do you want a screwdriver?" He said "Sure! But, first I have to change this tire." A vampire goes into a pub and asks for boi…

lol well the 3rd is about blowjobs

Q. I married Miss Right.A. I just didn't know her first name was "Always." Q. Three words to ruin a man's ego...A. "Is it in?" Q. Why do men die before their wives?A. They want to. Q. What did the elephant say to the naked man?A. "How do you breath through something so small?"

lol good one

Ask any man what a woman's ultimate fantasy is and they will tell you, to have two men at once. According to a recent social logical study this is true, however most men do not realize that in this fantasy, one man is cooking, and the other is cleaning. Between the ages of 16 and 18, she is like Africa, virgin and unexplored. Between the ages of 19 and 35, she is like Asia, hot and exotic. Between the ages of 36 and 45, she is like America, fully explored, breathtakingly beautiful, and free wit…